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» Slings & Arrows (Spoilers)
by kingairwick Sat Dec 29, 2012 2:31 am

» General Comics || Spoilers
by Chicanery Fri Dec 21, 2012 7:17 am

» This Board Is Moving
by affrosponge88 Thu Dec 20, 2012 2:36 am

» The Dark Knight Rises
by tym218 Wed Dec 19, 2012 3:40 pm

» ATLAS SHRUGGED
by pulpcomics Wed Dec 12, 2012 4:30 pm

» Wes Anderson
by Semi-bored torontonian Wed Dec 12, 2012 2:34 am

» What are you listening to?
by kingairwick Tue Dec 11, 2012 9:26 pm

» What are you watching this holiday season?
by kingairwick Tue Dec 11, 2012 9:17 pm

» Homicide: Life on the Street
by digifreak642 Tue Dec 11, 2012 8:33 pm

» Likes No Longer Visible
by affrosponge88 Tue Dec 11, 2012 4:29 pm


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    Birdie help

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    • Post n°1

    Birdie help Empty Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:32 pm

    This is a thread for when I need help and I have questions and such. Things I would need help on:

    • making threads
    • replying to someone
    • typing on a keyboard
    • eating food
    • walking
    • writing an essay
    • erasing my stupid essay
    • paying attention
    • understanding sex positions
    • understanding sex
    • liking people
    • liking people's posts
    • stop listing things
    • running a mile
    • walking to the couch
    • flying
    • flying on a plane
    • swimmming hehe. I can swim, you jerkwads
    • quitting the smokes
    • finishing drinking this 2-quart bottle of juice
    • running without whistling and giggling
    • stop eating food in bed
    • grow a beard
    • paint
    • drive
    • catch a baby squirrel/deer
    • wear tight crotch-hugging pants
    • stop describing bob from joy of painting
    • finishing what I started...
    • finding the post button on this thing
    • MAKING LISTS!!!!!!!


    Last edited by affrosponge88 on Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:58 pm; edited 4 times in total (Reason for editing : reasons for editing: SO I CAN PUT BULLETS IN THIS POST)
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    • Post n°2

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by Chicanery Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:35 pm

    1. You managed to mess up the list.
    2. Damn it, Birdie.
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    • Post n°3

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by odduck Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:35 pm

    Awww, that's so sweet. But only men can do most of the things on your list, including stop listing things. You just got the short stick when you were born without a penis. Deal with it. No
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    • Post n°4

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by stingo Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:37 pm

    Are these in order of importance? Because I'm amused that you want to understand sex positions before you understand sex.
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    • Post n°5

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:38 pm

    How do you make lists?

    Is this affro?
    afro
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    • Post n°6

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by The Narrator Returns Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:40 pm

    Well, you usually write down a bunch of things, which are usually related, possibly in order of their importance to you.

    No, that's his evil twin, Afrosmiley44.
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    • Post n°7

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:40 pm

    What are signatures? How do I get one? Can I scan in my own signature on a scanner and put that there?
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    • Post n°8

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by affrosponge88 Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:40 pm

    If nobody answers your board-related questions by the time I get home from work tonight, I will post a tutorial for you in the Board Maintenance forum.

    If nobody answers your sex-related questions by the time I get home from work, you'll be shit out of luck.
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    • Post n°9

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by The Narrator Returns Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:42 pm

    alittlebirdie wrote:What are signatures? How do I get one? Can I scan in my own signature on a scanner and put that there?

    Signatures usually involve funny quotes, pictures, or your name. They always appear at the bottom of your posts. I don't believe you can do that, but affro can tell you later.
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    • Post n°10

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:42 pm

    how do you reply to people?

    Why does my head hurt now?
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    • Post n°11

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by stingo Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:43 pm

    Use [ list ][ /list ] for this:

      number 1
      number 2
      number 3
      number 4
      number 5


    Use [ list=1 ][ /list], along with [*] in front of each entry, for this:

    1. number 1
    2. number 2
    3. number 3
    4. number 4
    5. number 5
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    • Post n°12

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by The Narrator Returns Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:44 pm

    alittlebirdie wrote:how do you reply to people?

    Why does my head hurt now?

    You post at the bottom of the thread. The forum is just one long discussion.

    Because you sinned, birdie. I don't even want to tell you what God saw the other night.
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    • Post n°13

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by Chicanery Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:44 pm

    Code:
    [list][*]making threads
    [*]replying to someone
    [*]typing on a keyboard
    [*]eating food
    [*]walking
    [*]writing an essay
    [*]erasing my stupid essay
    [*]paying attention
    [*]understanding sex positions
    [*]understanding sex
    [*]liking people
    [*]liking people's posts
    [*]stop listing things
    [*]running a mile
    [*]walking to the couch
    [*]flying
    [*]flying on a plane
    [*][strike]swimmming[/strike] hehe. I can swim, you jerkwads
    [*]quitting the smokes
    [*]finishing drinking this 2-quart bottle of juice
    [*]running without whistling and giggling
    [*]stop eating food in bed
    [*]grow a beard
    [*]paint
    [*]drive
    [*]catch a baby squirrel/deer
    [*]wear tight crotch-hugging pants
    [*]stop describing bob from joy of painting
    [*]finishing what I started...
    [*]finding the post button on this thing
    [*]MAKING LISTS!!!!!!![/list]

    Copy what's in the code box.
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    • Post n°14

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:44 pm

    How do I post my avatar? how do I edit my account?
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    • Post n°15

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by stingo Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:45 pm

    alittlebirdie wrote:how do you reply to people?

    Why does my head hurt now?

    Hit the "quote" button in the bottom right of a post that you'd like to quote. Otherwise you can just use the reply box at the bottom of the page or hit "post reply".

    As for a signature: hit the Navbar Menu drop-down in the top right of the page, select UCP, and then click the Signature tab above where it says Registration Information.
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    • Post n°16

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by affrosponge88 Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:46 pm

    You guys are all so helpful.

    It makes me tear up. Crying or Very sad
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    • Post n°17

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:46 pm

    God should be careful when he peeks in when I'm with bongoes. cheers
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    • Post n°18

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by odduck Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:46 pm

    Am I the only who thinks alittlebirdie is messing with all of you? Like... ever since her first post.


    Last edited by odduck on Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:46 pm; edited 1 time in total
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    • Post n°19

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by stingo Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:46 pm

    alittlebirdie wrote:How do I post my avatar? how do I edit my account?

    Navbar Menu in the top right, UCP, then the Avatar tab under the blue bar. Fun fact: there's lots more options for how to upload an avatar here than on the AVC!

    edit:

    odduck wrote:Am I the only who thinks alittlebirdie is messing with all of you?

    If it was anyone but Birdie, I would agree with you.
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    • Post n°20

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:51 pm

    I give up now
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    • Post n°21

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by affrosponge88 Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:53 pm

    alittlebirdie wrote:I give up now

    You had a good run, buddy.
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    • Post n°22

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by odduck Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:53 pm

    alittlebirdie wrote:I give up now

    Just ask bongoes and he'll teach you how to 4um. That's what men are for.
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    • Post n°23

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by Chicanery Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:54 pm

    One, never listen to Odduck. Two, you need to put [/list] on the end of the post.
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    • Post n°24

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by stingo Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:57 pm

    Chicanery wrote:One, never listen to Odduck. Two, you need to put [/list] on the end of the post.

    Does it not auto-close tags? Maybe that's an admin feature that could be turned on.
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    • Post n°25

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:58 pm

    odduck wrote:
    alittlebirdie wrote:I give up now

    Just ask bongoes and he'll teach you how to 4um. That's what men are for.

    What's 4um?
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    • Post n°26

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by affrosponge88 Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:59 pm

    I fixed it for you Birdie. consider this one a freebie.
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    • Post n°27

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by affrosponge88 Thu Nov 29, 2012 6:59 pm

    stingo wrote:
    Chicanery wrote:One, never listen to Odduck. Two, you need to put [/list] on the end of the post.

    Does it not auto-close tags? Maybe that's an admin feature that could be turned on.

    I'll look into this.
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    • Post n°28

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 7:02 pm

    affrosponge88 wrote:I fixed it for you Birdie. consider this one a freebie.

    YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAAYAYYAYYAYYAYAYAY!!!! THANK YOU! I swear, I got an A in a computer class. My friend helped me a lot in the assignments while I danced to old-timey music and played with my post-it notes and pretended they were a super cool superhero weapon(true story).
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    • Post n°29

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by Chicanery Thu Nov 29, 2012 7:09 pm

    Yeah, it's Birdie. I quite adore her.
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    • Post n°30

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by thebongoes Thu Nov 29, 2012 7:25 pm

    I'm willing to help with everything except running a mile. Because I'm lazy. And growing a beard, because you shouldn't do that.
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    • Post n°31

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 7:29 pm

    thebongoes wrote:I'm willing to help with everything except running a mile. Because I'm lazy. And growing a beard, because you shouldn't do that.

    GROWING A BREAD!!!!!


    Last edited by alittlebirdie on Thu Nov 29, 2012 7:36 pm; edited 2 times in total (Reason for editing : BECAUSE YOUR STUPID)
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    • Post n°32

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by The Narrator Returns Thu Nov 29, 2012 7:31 pm

    Well, to grow bread, you must first plant some Wonder Seeds.
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    • Post n°33

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by affrosponge88 Thu Nov 29, 2012 7:33 pm

    [quote="alittlebirdie"]
    thebongoes wrote:I'm willing to help with everything except running a mile. Because I'm lazy. And growing a beard, because you shouldn't do that.[/quote

    GROWING A BREAD!!!!!

    Oh Birdie... We're gonna have to give you a computer class, buddy.
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    • Post n°34

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by thebongoes Thu Nov 29, 2012 7:34 pm

    alittlebirdie wrote:GROWING A BREAD!!!!!

    No, I won't help with that either.
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    • Post n°35

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    Post by affrosponge88 Thu Nov 29, 2012 7:46 pm

    No beards.
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    • Post n°36

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    Post by odduck Thu Nov 29, 2012 7:47 pm

    No homo.
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    • Post n°37

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 8:10 pm

    Why do people insist on confronting obviously dangerous people on The Twilight Zone? And for that matter, any horror movie.

    HEY! I just found out that I'm presently in a town secretly inhabited by aliens! Let me go confront them about it!
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    • Post n°38

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    Post by The Narrator Returns Thu Nov 29, 2012 8:29 pm

    Get out of my head, Birdie! I'm watching the pilot of American Horror Story, and that trope (along with the similar, "let's do something we've been told is dangerous!") is all over the place.
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    • Post n°39

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by snowmania Thu Nov 29, 2012 8:43 pm

    Do you want help running a mile? I don't care if you don't even mean it; I can help! Just intersperse walking briskly with light jogging until you can go the whole mile without stopping. When I first started running I had never run a mile outside of elementary school, so it took a few weeks until I was comfortable. I would probably start out walking two minutes and then running thirty seconds to a minute and then back to walking. Eventually you can work on the proportions once you feel comfortable running harder.
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    • Post n°40

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 9:03 pm

    snowmania wrote:Do you want help running a mile? I don't care if you don't even mean it; I can help! Just intersperse walking briskly with light jogging until you can go the whole mile without stopping. When I first started running I had never run a mile outside of elementary school, so it took a few weeks until I was comfortable. I would probably start out walking two minutes and then running thirty seconds to a minute and then back to walking. Eventually you can work on the proportions once you feel comfortable running harder.

    Thanks, snowmania! I wasn;t taking that list item too seriously but I do have trouble running the mile. I suck at running. You guys should train me, Rocky-STYLE!
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    • Post n°41

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by The Narrator Returns Thu Nov 29, 2012 9:06 pm

    Well, I'll be no help in that. Although I did not place last or even second to last the last time I ran the mile in gym.
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    alittlebirdie
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    • Post n°42

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Thu Nov 29, 2012 9:21 pm

    How am I supposed to like all of bongoes posts now? Do I have to check EVERY thread? gahhhhhhhh
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    The Narrator Returns
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    • Post n°43

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by The Narrator Returns Thu Nov 29, 2012 9:33 pm

    On his profile, there's a button to press where you can view all his posts. You have to click on the link to be able to like them, but it's easier than searching every thread.
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    snowmania
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    • Post n°44

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by snowmania Thu Nov 29, 2012 9:45 pm

    alittlebirdie wrote:Thanks, snowmania! I wasn;t taking that list item too seriously but I do have trouble running the mile. I suck at running. You guys should train me, Rocky-STYLE!

    Definitely listen to "Eye of the Tiger" in an endless loop.
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    thebongoes
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    • Post n°45

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by thebongoes Thu Nov 29, 2012 10:48 pm

    alittlebirdie wrote:How am I supposed to like all of bongoes posts now? Do I have to check EVERY thread? gahhhhhhhh

    You don't have to like all my posts.
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    alittlebirdie
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    • Post n°46

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Fri Nov 30, 2012 4:29 pm

    thebongoes wrote:
    alittlebirdie wrote:How am I supposed to like all of bongoes posts now? Do I have to check EVERY thread? gahhhhhhhh

    You don't have to like all my posts.

    Sure I don't. elephant .... I couldn't find winky face.
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    enemynarwhal
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    • Post n°47

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by enemynarwhal Fri Nov 30, 2012 4:36 pm

    alittlebirdie wrote:

    Sure I don't. elephant .... I couldn't find winky face.

    Wink

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    • Post n°48

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Fri Nov 30, 2012 4:49 pm

    3 questions!!!!

    How can you tell which one is the real Steph?

    Is there more than one way to skin a cat? I can only name a couple:

    [list][*]skin the cat with a knife
    [*]boil the cat and peel off the skin
    [*]go jack-o lantern style and take out all the meat inside
    [*]peel off the skin carefully with tweezers and other instruments
    [*]put it in a pool of piranhas and the carnivorous fish eat at it only to the skin
    [*]burn the skin off


    How's Snow's cat, Maggie, doing anyways?[b]
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    odduck
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    • Post n°49

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by odduck Fri Nov 30, 2012 4:55 pm

    Somebody's a dog person.
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    alittlebirdie
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    • Post n°50

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

    Post by alittlebirdie Fri Nov 30, 2012 5:01 pm

    odduck wrote:Somebody's a dog person.

    I LOVE BOTH CATS AND DOGS!!!!!! THEY ARE SOOOOO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE LOVE LOVE
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    • Post n°51

    Birdie help Empty Re: Birdie help

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